WinShape Marriage | Julie Baumgardner Caps Social Service Career with Lead Position at WinShape Marriage
Sometimes God allows hardship to awaken a desire that will change the trajectory of our lives. Such is the case with Julie Baumgardner, Senior Director of WinShape Marriage, whose response to the emotional trauma caused by her parents’ divorce was to devote her life’s work to supporting marriage and family flourishing.
“When my father left, he left the entire family (including herself, her younger sister and an older brother with special needs),” Julie said. “I was devastated. I majored in psychology then went to graduate school to become a counselor to learn to work with couples and families. I thought if I could save one family from the pain I went through, it would be worth it.”
After reaching those goals, Julie counseled adolescents. She remembers parents bringing kids in wanting her to “fix” them. Over time she realized it wasn’t just the child who needed help. She learned of a prevention-oriented organization launching in Chattanooga, Tennessee that worked to address root causes of family breakdown by strengthening marriages and families, which appealed to her.
“So many times when I was counseling couples, I realized they had perfectly good marriages that had just gotten in a ditch. They could get out of that ditch, but they didn’t want to work that hard. I wanted to help them have the information and tools to do marriage well. Pouring into the lives of these couples was very intriguing to me,” she added.
Julie helped start First Things First, in 1997. The original five founders gave the initial Execute Director and her the bones — a mission to decrease divorce, increase fathers’ involvement in the lives of their children, and decrease unwed births. It was up to the new team to “put skin on it” and create programming. In 2001 Julie became president and CEO. During her tenure at FTF she taught, spoke, wrote a weekly newspaper column and hosted a television show, first on PBS, then Julie B TV on YouTube.
“First Things First still means a lot to me, and I care about how they are impacting so many lives,” she said. In her work there she found people desperately want to know how to be in healthy relationships.
“People are so hungry to be loved and know they are valued. Many young people are interested in being married, but they don’t believe they have the skills to be successful. They settle for what they think they can accomplish,” she said.
“People are not confident they have what it takes. If you don’t seek to learn new skills, you do what’s familiar – and it’s often the very thing you said you’d never do. You don’t realize how ingrained what you learned in childhood is in your DNA. You carry how you saw or didn’t see adults dealing with conflict, dealing with challenges, what your parents did when they got angry. You carry your family with you.”
Her message: “You can do it. You can learn how to be healthy and show up, and that’s the greatest gift you can give. You just have to be willing to be intentional about growing and learning.”
Along with her position at First Things First, Julie was invited to testify in front of the U.S. Congress about the benefits of healthy marriage and also spoke at a Helping America’s Youth conference at the White House under President George W. Bush’s administration. Part of her work was to give people permission to have a conversation about the impact of healthy marriages on a community. She helped start the National Alliance for Relationship & Marriage Education (NARME) and chaired its board from 2009-2020.
In 2020 she was asked if she would consider interviewing for the role of Senior Director at WinShape Marriage. “You could have knocked me over with a feather! It was one of the bigger shocks of my life,” she said. “But I felt like the Lord was preparing me that change was coming, as I had just finished a 10-year strategic succession plan with First Things First at the end of 2019.”
WinShape Foundation was initially started in 1984 by Truett Cathy as a college ministry to help students learn leadership and discipleship skills. WinShape Camps was started soon afterward, followed by WinShape’s Homes and WinShape Teams. WinShape Marriage, which started in 2003, is the latest ministry under the foundation’s umbrella. The marriage ministry is committed to helping couples grow closer to each other and to the Lord, Julie said. “Our hope is that we have something for everyone no matter what season of marriage they are in.
All retreats and intensives are held on the 27,000-acre campus of Berry College in Rome, Georgia.
“We want to encourage people to be intentional about caring for their relationships. The moment you think your marriage is not vulnerable is the time of most vulnerability. Being on autopilot isn’t going to serve your marriage or family well,” she added.
WinShape offers more than 20 different marriage experiences. Retreats cover a variety of topics specifically designed to meet people where they are. The experiential learning process of the three-day weekend getaway is designed to strengthen couples in their marriage journey.
“During the weekend, couples will learn Bible-based teaching from retreat speakers and worship together in a large group setting. This format allows couples to connect with others in similar seasons of life and relax with each other on the peaceful campus, growing closer to one another and the Lord,” Julie said.
Each experience includes five elements of transformation:
Sequestered setting away from the chaos of life. The retreat center is located three miles into the campus far from the sounds of the city. Couples will be able to get off their devices, breathe, hear from the Lord and focus on each other.
Worship. Each session includes a time worship.
Biblically rooted, research-informed content. Information and skills will help couples take their relationship to the next level.
Grace based hospitality. A warm, safe space serves people well, allowing them to relax and unwind.
Experiential learning. Participation through activities provides a more powerful experience than just listening.
As Senior Director of Marriage, Julie leads a group of innovators who are not afraid to try new things. In 2022 they received 2000 meaningful answers to a survey that asked people how they make decisions about going on a retreat and about topics they’d like to hear. The team responded by creating offerings to meet the requests.
“There is a whole group of people who have no desire to come sit and soak in information,” Julie said, “so we created some romantic adventures where couples spend most of their time outside.”
The Couples Quest Experience is a physically active retreat where couples spend time exploring the WinShape campus by navigating to different waypoints to complete spiritual, emotional and physical challenges designed to help them grow closer to each other and to the Lord.
Other retreats include, among others:
Seasons – which is a self-guided experience.
Woven – for foster and adoptive parents
Resist the Drift – a couples’ connection led by Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley
Marriage Prep – for seriously dating and engaged couples
God, Sex and Your Marriage – with Juli Slattery
Parents Weekend (known in the past as Thriving Parents, Thriving Family)
Together in the Journey – for those parenting a special-needs child
Empty Nest Success – taught by Jim Burns
Many of these offerings were developed after receiving the survey results. The WinShape Marriage team has been very intentional about meeting the needs of newlyweds.
“We have been offering a marriage prep experience for a long time. At the end of the retreat, couples would often ask, ‘What can we do next?’ I realized we had a lot of great retreats, but nothing focused on them. The earlier we can help couples learn skills and tools the less drama and trauma they will have later,” she said.
One of the topics in the Newlywed Weekend Retreat addresses how a couple’s marriage will be impacted when a baby arrives. “Child centered marriages are most at risk for distress,” Julie said. “When a marriage is healthy and thriving, chances are the child is going to do well. The culture tells you your children should come first, but research and God’s Word tell you to prioritize your marriage, and that’s like wrapping a security blanket around your children.”
Participants at WinShape’s Marriage Experiences have been enthusiastic. “They leave encouraged that they can take that one next step to enhance their marriage,” Julie said. “We are not looking for perfect – we are looking for healthy.”
Anne P had this to say:
“The culture tells you your children should come first, but research and God’s Word tell you to prioritize your marriage, and that’s like wrapping a security blanket around your children.”
“It was a wonderful weekend in every way—the time to strengthen our marriage, warm fellowship, new tools for a vision in this season, the delicious and abundant food, beautiful accommodations, worship, and the opportunity to experience the glory of God on the grounds of WinShape. Everything was done with excellence, and every person we encountered was a shining light for Jesus. Grant and Monique are fabulous communicators who helped cast a strong vision for a healthy and thriving marriage. We are so grateful for every blessing of this past weekend!”
Sometimes, couples need more than just a weekend getaway. Julie compares attending a Marriage Retreat to performing regular car maintenance like changing the oil. But sometimes larger issues like changing the timing belt or replacing the tires need to be addressed to keep a car running well. That’s where a Marriage Intensive comes in. Marriage Retreats focus on encouraging and strengthening couples, while Marriage Intensives concentrate on breakthrough and transformation.
Marriage Intensives are week-long experiences where couples will “dig beneath the surface to uncover dynamics that interfere with having a healthy relationship. Designed to take marriages to the next level, the intensive experience can help hurting couples heal by providing tools that allow them to break free from the cycle of damaging patterns as well as addressing issues that impede their growth.
“Maybe, you’re stuck in a cycle of shame and deep hurt, and you need a breakthrough. Or, your marriage is in crisis, and divorce seems like the only option. Perhaps, your marriage is healthy, but you and your spouse would benefit from extended, focused time to really dig deep.
“If any of these situations resonate with you, then consider attending a Marriage Intensive, an experience that encourages honesty to bring healing,” Julie explained.
Marriage Intensives are offered nearly every week by Focus on the Family and Center for Relational Care. Each ministry offers its unique approach to guide a couple through a Marriage Intensive experience.
“We are seeing a very steady interest in the intensive experience,” Julie said. “It’s a beautiful thing that people are reaching out and not just trying to do it on their own.”
In addition to retreat experiences, WinShape Marriage creates and curates content found at Winshapemarriage.org and on the WinShapeMarriage Instagram page. Helpful pieces like 140 free conversation starters for couples and blog posts on relevant topics include “best of the bests” from authors like Shaunti Feldhaun, Ted Lowe and Juli Slattery.
Julie Baumgardner
What Truett Cathy started in 1984 now reaches across the globe many times over. Don’t just trust your marriage to anybody. Find the support you need at any stage at WinShape Marriage.
WinShapemarriage.org and WinShapemarriage on Instagram.
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